Surfacing
by BlueIce
Summary: one of Duo's missions goes horribly, horribly wrong, and the boy sends Heero a message; 1+2+1 shounen ai, please R


_Disclaimer = _unfortunately, Gundam Wing belongs to Sunrise, but I own a little Deathscythe! Also, the song 'I Love You' is property of Sarah McLachlan

_Pairing = _1+2+1

_Warnings = _deathfic, I don't know if in the Gundams can be taped and sent messages via e-mail, so if I'm wrong, don't get angry ^__^ and this is my first Gundam Wing fic, even though I've read hundreds

**SURFACING**

I have a smile 

_Stretched from ear to ear_

_To see you waling down the road_

_We meet at the lights_

_I stare for a while_

_The world around us disappears_

_Just you and me_

_On this island of hope_

_A breath between us could be miles_

_Let me surround you_

_My sea to your shore_

_Let me be the calm you seek_

_Oh and everytime I'm close to you_

_There's too much I can't say_

_And you just walk away_

_And I forgot to tell you I love you_

_And the night's too long_

_ And  cold here without you_

_I grieve in my condition_

_For I cannot find the words to say_

_I need you so_

_Oh and everytime I'm close to you_

_There's too much I can't say_

_And you just walk away_

_And I forgot to tell you I love you_

_And the night's too long_

_ And  cold here without you_

_I grieve in my condition_

_For I cannot find the words to say_

_I need you so_

"Damn cables…so…finally I did it. Hey Heero, how are you faring man? You're not still glued to that bloody laptop of yours I hope, I wonder how you managed to not get blind staring at it every single minute of the day! Oh, you're right…to listen to this message you actually _have to_ be using that laptop, baka me. because that's what I've always been to you, a baka who can't keep his mouth closed, ne? Ch', don't pull that face, contrary to popular belief, I know when stop talking. Surprise surprise." _/electric sounds are heard/ _"Sorry buddy, 'Scythe here is being difficult today.

Ne Heero, don't sneer, my Deathscythe is and forever _will _be the best Gundam, take that smirk off your face, do you think I can't see it? Ah, my dear, I know you too well!

_/more metallic sounds/_

Heero, don't frown, you'll get wrinkles prematurely, how much more do I have to tell you that? I know you're wondering what's the reason for this message, one moment, I'm getting to it! Have you said ninmu ryoukai? Good. You'll never change.

Heero, have you ever wondered what the world will be like once this bloody war is over? For sooner or later it has to end, hasn't it? I always do, even though we probably won't live enough to see it. Try to imagine…close your eyes…don't peep! See, finally the sky is clean, with no military airplanes, mobile suits o flying projectiles; there only are birds. Look down: there are no submarines in the sea: there's no destruction on the land, in the strees no more corpses, no more widows, no more orphans.

Can you see all of this? This is my dream. A naïve dream, but a dream nonetheless.

Heero, I'm dying.

Shinigami, the God of Death, that's me.

Don't look at me like that, you know it would have happened sooner or later. I was waiting for it for so long.

I'm dying.

I didn't fail the mission, I swear, Heero I didn't fail. Believe me, I sent them all to Hell. All thirty of them. No one survived. Aren't you proud of me, o Mighty Perfect Soldier?

Too bad I have no energy supplies for 'Scythe left. Too bad my big friend is not in such a good shape. Too bad I have only twenty minutes of oxygen left.

I'm going to die.

There, I said it…it doesn't feel so scary, you know? What? No, calling for reinforcements was useless, it takes two hours to reach my location and I had oxygen supplies for just thirty minutes.

Correction, now I have only nineteen. Cute, ne?

You know Heero, I wish we were friends; you are to me, why do you think I saved you from that lab? Because I had shot you twice and wanted to apologize? Well, not just for that…

Something about you intrigued me, no, I said it wrong; something about you attracted me: you looked so cold…but you eyes hid something, and I wanted to be the one to find that particular thing. I don't know if I ever did…but sometimes, when you stared blankly at the screen of the computer (yes, you do! Don't think I never noticed!) I felt closer to that secret of yours. Little by little my curiosity developed into a full obsession. During the day I acted like usual, you called me a baka, I joked about it; but during the nights I sat on the edge of the bed, and I stayed like that watching you for hours and hours; you know when you sleep you look innocent? Sometimes you had nightmares, all five of us have them, and I stopped and hugged you softly. To calm you I sang to you a lullaby I had learnt when I lived in the Maxwell Church, I told you about it, remember? Then I went back to staring, every night. I don't know why, I don't know how it all started, but it happened. Heero, how can you possibly be that dense?

_/a light burst is heard/_

God, I nearly had a fit. 

How ironic…Sister Helen begged God to protect me just before she died in my arms; too bad I don't believe in God; maybe that's why he's never protected me; if there was someone up there this war would not be, I would not be here to tape this stupid message that is even going to be my last one. Seen Heero, I will finally shut up, ne?

_/some seconds of absolute silence/_

He…Heero? Will you tell Wufei I'm sorry for everytime I made fun of him? and for that time I painted Nataku pink? Tell Trowa I spilt his hair gel, it wasn't one of Quatre's servants. And tell our little Arab to make his move with Trowa, since I'm sick and tired of hearing 'how green Trowa's eyes are' o 'such nice legs he has'. And tell him to not blush.

Heero…Heero, you'll tell them, won't you?

Heero, I'll miss you. I'll miss all of you. I wish I could say I will protect you from up there, but if there really is something after death, if there really are those godly places, well, I think it's more correct saying I'll protect you from _down _there.

Heero, don't leave me. Please Heero. Heero, I don't want to die. Not like this. Heero, I wish I could see you one last time, Heero, I wish I could see you smile, you never smiled for me before. Please Heero, onegai, smile fore me? I know you can do it. Heero, are you smiling?

Heero, why won't you smile…

All those time, all these months, and I never… I never…

Heero, I forgot to tell you I love you…

…

…

…

Ja ne Heero…"

*Taping complete. Send? File sent, waiting for reply…* 

**~Owari~**

A/N = dammit, I don't like the way it turned out, it sounds so…sappy ;__;

Anyway, I accept any comment and constructive criticism, but not flames, so wanna flame? Go somewhere else :-) this was my first fic, you shouldn't have asked for more. Plus, for any grammatical mistakes, English is not my first language, so there.


End file.
